PLANNING TO LEAVE

TIPS FOR LEAVING AN ABUSER

The process of leaving an abusive relationship is difficult and dangerous. Safety is the primary concern. Even if you do not think your partner poses a risk, leaving often triggers an increase in violence. It is best to prepare as much as you can ahead of time.
Ask a friend or family member to keep items you gather to take with you. Make sure the person you choose will not tell your abuser about your plans to leave. Do not take anything that will be noticed as missing.
Recommended List of Things to Stash Away If Possible:

Money
Contact information for a local domestic violence shelter
Prescribed medications
Legal documents for you and your children (e.g. birth certificates, social security cards)
Photographs or written evidence of the abuse
Financial records and account numbers
Clothing and personal needs

Recommended List of Things to Arrange if Possible:

A plan that safely removes yourself and you children from the home
Transportation for yourself, children and belongings
A safe place to stay if not entering an emergency shelter.
How to manage being gone from home for an extended time
Referral to a lawyer or legal advocate to obtain a personal protection order, temporary child custody order, etc.
A safe place to store personal belongings possessing sentimental value

Thank you for joining FCC Walk-A-Mile@DCB! Your participation is an important voice in your community!

Do you know what your participation means?
Healing begins here, today...thanks to you!
Scroll down...I want you to know how much you are appreciated!

In the words of SURVIVORS- "TALK ABOUT IT"
Desarae’s Story:Desarae Garcia is a social worker, mother, podcast creator, storyteller, and survivor of child sexual abuse. “I’m a huge advocate for people to be trauma informed. If someone tells you they’ve been abused, believe them. If it’s too much for you to handle, find someone else who can help.”

Kaylee’s Story:
Kaylee Conway was sexually abused by an extended family member. As with most children experiencing sexual abuse, she didn’t have the words to understand what was happening at the time. “To me, there was always this elephant in the room. I wanted to talk about it, but didn’t know how. I thought that because they didn’t ask, they didn’t want to talk about it. I blamed a lot of my extended family members for not bringing it up, but I wasn’t ready for that conversation either.”

Dedeker’s Story:
Dedeker Winston is an author, relationship coach, podcast host, and survivor of intimate partner violence. “What I want on a T-shirt or maybe my gravestone is the phrase ‘no jerk is worth it.’ You are worth so much more. Every single person is worth so much more than putting up with abusive behavior.”

Nelson’s Story:
Nelson Hincapie is a husband, father, Colombian-American, and president and CEO of the Voices For Children Foundation. He is also a survivor of child sexual abuse. “I don’t think it’s talked about at all. I think that for heterosexual men to be abused in their childhood by adult males it is a source of great shame and deep wounds."

Leaving an unhealthy relationship can be a difficult decision. Our advocates are here to listen and help you, safely.

Leaving an unhealthy relationship can be a difficult decision.
Our advocates are here to listen and help you, safely.